May 31 2004-empty,empty,empty.

My first entry in an online blog...ha ha...never thought i will write one,well..didn't even have the habit of keeping a diary like this..well..people change.
Life is so empty for me at this phase of my life.its just so empty.i should be happy now that i am finishing my term as a national slave fulltime(NSF),but this phase of my life is really just abt. waiting...waiting for my clearance,waiting for my class 3 license,waiting for my pink ic,waiting for school term to start,waiting for the results of my teaching award,wait,wait,wait,wait,it just kinda drives me crazy with all this uncertainties hanging around in my life.
21,I'm finally 21...an age when i'm considered an adult,I got voting rights!!i could watch RA movies...legally...ha ha...but this age also makes me feel OLD....there's so many things to think abt. at 21...when will i be able to have a car?will i ever find true love?does jesus really exist?will i ever be able to be a foreign diplomat?am i really cut out to rise above all n excel..instead of been condemned to mediocrity..
well...there's so much that i want to say over so little....i'm in such a pessismist mood now that if i do continue writing this blog,i will sure hope that i could meet both hitler n satan n ask them whether they need a new assistant..or something..btw,i'm quite an admirer of Adolf Hitler-despite his human flaw,evil heart,racist mind,he's really a powerful man who capture all german's hearts with his thoughts,ideas n speeches,he's really a man we should admire in a sadistic carnal world of where only the fittest can survive...to be compassionate to others is to be cruel to yourselves..the rich just get richer,the poor just get poorer.....life is indeed cruel.i shall end now,hopefully,i won't feel that empty tmr...