Grandma's birthday

I went for my Grandma's birthday celebration this evening. Can't help but notice the absence of some of my uncles, aunties and cousins..has life gotten that busy for them to actually miss ah ma's b'day..haiz...

My Ah Ma is 76 le, a very strong woman,someone whom I not only respect a lot but also shares a special bond with. She went through so much, raising 6 daughters and 3 sons singlehandedly, still selling the same vegetables, bean sprouts, mee,etc,etc today(even when she can retire le) and still worrying about her children and her grandchildren. I would like to think that I have not given her any reason to worry about me, but I am not so foolish to even contemplate that thought.....

I am her favorite grandchild. As the son of her eldest son and also the eldest grandson, I guess this comes as no surprise. I must be that first special bundle of joy. And I remembered she did spoil me a lot. What I can't get from my parents, I got from her. I don't have any figment of memory of her scolding me but only how she rub away my tears, be there for me,siding with me even when I'm wrong and I guess, just the sight of her calms me, sometimes, perhaps even more than the presence of my parents. She doesn't have to say that she loves me, I can feel it, geniune, altruistic love that she has for every one of her children and her grandchildren....

Maybe that's why the absence of these aunties,uncles and cousins was quite poignant for me. I have never missed Ah Ma's birthday and I made a promise to myself today that I will try my very best to attend Ah Ma's birthday as much as circumstances allow me to. For what can be more important than the birthday of my dearest ah ma(maybe, a mission in the name of national security is one such matter though :p-haha, think too much le).

Ah Ma, I know its not in our family tradition to say this and I don't think you will ever hear this from me in person or been able to read this blog entry,but I just wanted to say,

I love you. Happy Birthday :)